Disability Pride Month: ‘Disabled LGBTQ+ people can be sexual too’

“See disabled LGBTQ+ people as individuals who are also sexual beings” says Dr Ju Gosling when asked what she wants people to take away from Disability Pride Month.

The celebration takes place every July, to highlight the resilience, creativity and achievements of disabled people.

Gosling, the he co-chairperson of Regard, a national organisation for LGBTQ+ people who self-identify as disabled, is an artist and artistic director. She developed a spinal curvature as a teenager and, because of genetic immune conditions, is permanently shielding following the COVID-19 pandemic

Gosling defines her sexuality as “queer by nature and lesbian by choice” and has been with her partner for 25 years, and married for two.

‘We need to look at the whole rainbow’

For her, visibility remains vital: “As an LGBTQ+ community, we need to look at the issues facing people of colour and disabled people. Let’s not pretend all our experiences and challenges are the same. We need to look at the whole rainbow.”

She goes on to highlight harmful assumptions that continue to affect disabled people: “There’s still this idea that disabled people can’t be gay because we’re seen as asexual or genderless — even childlike — so sex becomes taboo. These attitudes allow abuse to go unchecked because sexuality is hidden and seen as wrong if you’re disabled.”

Ju also notes how confusion around sexuality and orientation further contributes to erasure: “People assume we don’t have a sexual orientation or face discrimination. It’s just an absolute lack of visibility”. 

‘We were the last comparator’

She says these are not isolated beliefs: “These are social issues. People absorb these prejudices without realising it. I spent years wondering why raising disability issues in LGBTQ+ spaces was so difficult.” She links this marginalisation to Darwinian thinking: Darwin claimed men evolved to be more intelligent and inventive. That logic makes everyone else ‘less than.’ 

Ju adds: “It’s like we’ve had to say, ‘our brains and bodies are just as good as white men’s,’ and we were the last comparator.”

Shielding since 2020, Ju would like to see more online LGBTQ+ events, though she acknowledges some people still need physical venues to be themselves safely. “The reason that hybrid events are so important is that LGBTQI+ people become very isolated when we are disabled,” she explains.

“Socialising within the community is still very much centred on venues rather than people’s homes, not least because having gay visitors can make all concerned more vulnerable to hate crime.” She notes that crimes such as “cuckooing” – a practice where people take over a person’s home and use the property to facilitate exploitation – tend to increase when people are perceived as isolated.

She welcomes increased casting of disabled people in media – citing actress Liz Carr as a breakthrough, but says disabled voices have faded from politics.

“As an organisation, we used to be part of government consultations. That ended under Boris Johnson’s government in 2019, we’ve heard nothing since,” she reveals. 

To mark Disability Pride Month, PinkNews also spoke with Daniele Lul, co-founder of a charity for LGBTQ+ disabled people, who shared his hopes for a more inclusive future.

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