What is demisexuality? YouTuber Christi Kerr explains

Christi Kerr explains what demisexuality is

For YouTuber Christi Kerr, demisexuality means she doesn’t have “feelings of romantic and sexual attraction” to people that she isn’t already close to.

Christi came out as demisexual two years ago on YouTube and since then has used her online platform to challenge people’s misconceptions about demisexuality.

She says: “Demisexuality is more than choosing not to have sex outside of a relationship, it’s genuinely not being interested in sex with people outside of a close friendship.”

Watch the video below to hear about Christi Kerr share her experience of demisexuality:

Demisexuality is on the asexual spectrum

“You very rarely experience sexual attraction and when you do it’s towards someone that you have a very strong emotional bond with,” Christi tells PinkNews.

Christi has limited sexual attraction to people. She says that “a demisexual person would not feel sexual attraction towards people that they see walking down the street or an acquaintance.”

“Demisexuality is a sexuality on the asexual spectrum,” Christi tells PinkNews.

However, it is not identical to asexuality—there’s already plenty of myths that need dispelling about what it means to be asexual.

Demisexuality is different to celibacy

Christi says that a lot of people mistake demisexuality for celibacy, which is abstaining from sex with people that you do not know.

Explaining the difference, she says celibacy is “having a sexual attraction and not acting on it” whereas “demisexuality is not having the sexual attraction” in the first place, and that “it’s not a choice.”


Christi believes the misconceptions stem from people not knowing enough about what it means.

Dating as a demisexual

Christi shares that she has a desire to date but her sexuality makes it harder, saying that “dating either goes really well or really badly.”

“I can go on dates and see that there is chemistry,” but she says that her sexuality stops a romantic or sexual attraction from happening.

Christi has “a desire to be in a relationship but [there’s] nobody that [she’s] attracted to.”