Big Brother star Frankie’s coming out illustrates issue many bisexual people face

Big Brother housemate Frankie has become a major talking point for viewers of the ITV2 reality show since he came out as bisexual.

The 23-year-old came out to Big Brother in the Diary Room early on in the series, and was praised by viewers for his openness and vulnerability, with many celebrating the bisexual representation on a national television show. Later, during the episode which aired on 13 October he came out to his co-star, Yasmin.

Now, Frankie has mentioned that he had already come out to his girlfriend, which caused some confusion with fans after he previously said he was single. But his coming out to Yasmin is what caused a real stir among viewers, despite their earlier praise.

He told Yasmin: “I found out only a year-and-a-half ago. Over the years, I’d always chase money, I’d always chase fame, to some degree. I always chased validation all the time, and was just trying to fill a void. In the end, I just looked at myself and thought, ‘There’s something wrong.’ I was basically wearing a mask all my life, living a lie.”

Frankie explained he went into a “bad state” when he came to terms with his sexuality, before adding: “I could never get with a boy. I wouldn’t, I just wouldn’t. I just wouldn’t be able to bring myself to do it.”

That, and his comments about chasing fame and money, have led some viewers to believe he may not be telling the truth. Some have even compared him to Cameron Cole, who came out as gay in a tear-jerking moment on Big Brother in 2018 and went on to win the series.

After the 13 October episode, social media was filled with viewers questioning him – how can he be bisexual if he would never get with a man? Is he coming out to try and create a storyline for himself? Is he actually bisexual?

For starters, lying about his sexuality to tug at viewers’ heartstrings on national television would be an incredibly silly thing to do. While his social media is deactivated while he’s in the house, viewers have found screenshots of his accounts, which suggest he could be trying to go down the influencer route, with prank videos and the like, having around 22,000 followers on TikTok.

And if he does plan on “chasing fame”, as he has admitted he has done in the past, staging a fake coming out would get him off to a bad start in a time when authenticity sells.

On top of that, PR specialist Kayley Cornelius spoke to PinkNews about the reality of reality television, reminding viewers that what they see is a small chunk of what actually happens.

Cornelius said: “Coming out on a reality TV show can be a big moment for someone, but it also opens them up to public scrutiny, particularly when their personal life becomes part of the storyline.

“Viewers can be quick to question someone’s motives, especially when they’re sharing something personal in front of the cameras. However, it’s important to remember that we only see a small, edited snapshot of life in the house and the conversations that have led up to this moment, so there can be a lot more to their story than what makes it to screen.

“Accusing someone of using their sexuality for a storyline can be damaging, as it risks undermining a very personal experience.

“Ultimately, viewers are only seeing a small, edited snapshot of someone’s life, and there will always be conversations and personal experiences that happen away from the cameras. It’s important to remember that we don’t know the full story behind someone’s journey, so what we see on screen shouldn’t necessarily be taken as the complete picture.”

‘There is no right or wrong way to be bi’

Aside from that, though, the social media criticism highlights a problem many bisexual people face, even from some within the LGBTQ+ community.

Speaking to PinkNews, Matthew James Belfield, Head of Marketing, Communications and Editorial for LGBT Foundation said: “As someone who’s bi, I know coming out can be complicated, but imagine doing it in a high-pressure environment like the Big Brother house. Frankie’s experience shows that there is no right or wrong way to be bi. There is no single bi experience, and bisexuality takes many forms.

“One of the biggest misconceptions, particularly about bi men, is that being bi is simply a stepping stone to coming out as gay. That stereotype still exists, but it doesn’t reflect reality. A person’s sexuality isn’t defined by who they’re dating, and people remain part of the LGBTQ+ community regardless of their relationship.

“It was encouraging to hear Frankie speak about the support he received from his girlfriend. Their relationship highlights the trust, understanding and acceptance that can make these conversations easier. Part of being open about your sexuality is being honest with the people who matter to you.

“At LGBT Foundation, we support many people who are exploring their identity. We do that by encouraging people to approach these conversations with curiosity and understanding. People’s understanding of themselves can evolve over time, and that’s something to celebrate. Everyone deserves the space to be themselves, on their own terms.”

‘You don’t need to prove yourself to anyone!’

Rin Harris, Education Manager at Brook, agreed, telling PinkNews: “Coming out is different for everyone. Depending on your previous experiences and circumstances, it may be a lot harder for some people to both understand who they’re attracted to and what they want to do about it – if anything. There is no one ‘correct’ way to be bisexual, it varies between individuals.

“Bisexual people don’t necessarily experience attraction to different genders in the same way, at the same time, or to the same degree. Some bi people might never have a relationship with someone of the same gender. Others might only have relationships with someone of the same gender. Some people might feel confident in their sexuality from a young age, while others may take years to be ready to express how they feel. All of these are valid experiences, and you don’t need to prove yourself to anyone!”

‘He’s clearly battling demons’

Celebrity Big Brother runner-up and RuPaul’s Drag Race UK champ Danny Beard also weighed in on The Group Chat on 14 October, saying: “I think he’s clearly battling demons. I think, if he’s said he’s bisexual, we have to take that on face value. I think anyone debating around that, if someone says this and that, you’re online debating, there’s no room in my life for that.”

Host GK Barry, who is also queer, suggested Frankie could be dealing with “internalised homophobia”, offering: “You want to say bisexual, but you don’t want to go too far in case people are like, ‘No, that’s a bit much.'”

Co-host Kate Lawler agreed, remembering his tears when he came out in the Diary Room. She said: “I believe that there is somebody, and we don’t know who, that he just feels won’t accept it.”

Whatever Frankie’s situation, it is his to share if and when he feels comfortable – and online accusations won’t make it any easier, either way.

Big Brother continues Sunday to Friday at 9pm on ITV2 and ITVX.

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