Alan Carr’s ex Paul Drayton says he was treated like a ‘nobody’ during marriage
Alan Carr and ex-husband Paul Drayton (Image: Getty Images)
Alan Carr’s ex-husband Paul Drayton has said he was “overlooked and dismissed” as a “nobody” during their marriage, as he promotes his new memoir Ride – Or Die Trying.
Speaking to PA (via The Mirror), Drayton said the book is partly about being seen in his own right.
The 54-year-old said: “In the past, I think I have been overlooked and dismissed because I’m a ‘nobody’, basically, everyone just knows who I was married to.”
He added: “That’s partly one of the reasons why I’ve written the book – I’m not just their ex-husband, I’m my own independent person.”
Drayton and Carr were married in 2018 after 10 years together. Their wedding took place in Los Angeles and was officiated by Adele. They announced their separation in 2022 following Drayton’s conviction for drunk driving.
Why he wrote the memoir
Drayton said he “opened [himself] bare” in the memoir and wanted people to hear his “true” story. He also said he wanted to be seen as more than “just ‘the alcoholic’”.
In the interview, Drayton reflected on growing up in 1970s Sunderland and the shame he felt about being gay back then.
He said he “didn’t want to be gay” because it was considered “wrong”, and described trying to “suppress” his sexuality, telling himself he would “get a wife” and “be normal”.
Coming out, alcohol and sobriety
Drayton said he came out as gay aged 17 at his brother’s stag-do after drinking, explaining that alcohol gave him the “courage” to “talk about things more openly and freely”.
He linked that to anxiety, and said alcohol later became a way to self-medicate his then-undiagnosed ADHD, describing his brain as a “washing machine”. Drayton said he may have been a functioning alcoholic for 20 years.
He said he hit “rock bottom” in 2022 and described himself as a “broken man”. Drayton said he has been sober since then, calling sobriety “daily work” and saying he is proud of keeping it up.
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