Straight man writes an essay complaining that heterosexuality is being ‘marginalised’

Let’s face it, it’s really, really tough to be a straight white man, underrepresented in all corners of society, underpaid, at risk, and voiceless, we get it when some cry, “When’s straight Pride!” because, quite frankly, when the bloody hell is it?

A journalist, who is a straight white man, has written an article in The Spectator moaning that, “Heterosexuality is marginalised by our liberal arts culture.”

A straight journalist has moaned that heterosexuality is being ‘marginalised’ (Call Me By Your Name)

Don’t worry, he hastens to add not in the mainstream stuff, like Love Island and Harry and Meghan getting hitched, but you know, the arty things that are exclusively for clever people and LGBTs (sorry, you’re only allowed to enjoy films with subtitles and performance art, no ITV2 for you!).

The writer was riled when he watched a short monologue on BBC4’s Hear Her series, called Snatches about how a Liverpudlian woman in 1963 discovered the joys of an orgasm, “But of course without the aid of a dull old man.”

He kindly added it was well written and acted and, “I make no complaint about the soft-porn content.”

Nowadays the only highbrow sex that’s shown involves the LGBT community, apparently (A Fantastic Woman)

Then going full Carrie Bradshaw: “But it did make me think: our culture has gone a bit weird. It seems that its liberal creative wing no longer finds sex sexy unless it is grinding an edgy political axe. If it lacks this edge, it is crass, banal at best, oppressive at worst. Sex in which straight men play a role now feels…inappropriate, dirty.”

Hairy chested, mums’ favourite Poldark then gets dragged in as he’s only for the stupid folk apparently, none of those deep types.

“I felt the same during the BBC season celebrating gay love last year. Straight sex doubtless still features on shows like Poldark, but not in things made for more intelligent folk,” he whines.

Poor Poldark is only for thicker folk (BBC)

“In cinema too, it is gay love that has an aura of depth and mystery (Call Me By Your Name is one of a long list). You might say: well, there’s more drama in love (or plain sex) that’s edgy and forbidden, but that’s not really good enough: art should be able to find the drama in the mainstream.”

He later remarks that this is a “major cultural problem” and it’s “unhealthy” that we can’t celebrate what is mainstream, slipping back to seeing sex as “dirty, shameful – now on the grounds that male semi-violence is involved.”

Straight sex is now seen as something that’s “dirty” (God’s Own Country)

The solution is that a big public festival is organised “with big naked puppets of our first parents.”

A thousand times yes!

He finishes: “Sex is nothing to be ashamed of, even the straight sort.”

Thanks for letting us know, pal.