The PinkNews guide to surviving a Brexit Christmas
Now that the Brexit vote has happened and the UK is out, you may be anxious about returning home to friends or family for the holidays who may not share your views on the issue.
This guide probably applies more to those who strongly supported the remain vote, but could be quite useful for anyone unsure on how to discuss the subject with loved ones.
The PinkNews Guide to surviving a Brexit Christmas:
1 – Don’t discuss Brexit
Seriously – whenever possible, DON’T discuss what is about to happen with those you choose to spend the holidays with.
2 – ESPECIALLY don’t discuss Brexit while drinking
If drinking is your thing, you are probably wise to avoid combining a few cream sherries or 18 glasses of Baileys with a heated discussion on the single market, free movement or any other EU-related chats.
Nb. If you are chuffed that 52 percent of Brits voted to leave the EU, don’t brag about it after one too many scoops of brandy butter. People are quite raw about it and you don’t want to ruin their holiday.
3 – But if it does come up – don’t panic
So being stuck in the house all Christmas weekend with whoever you spend your days with could lead to THAT conversation about our impending doom/glory.
If it comes up, don’t panic – you can do this – don’t lose your rag, don’t brag, don’t cry, don’t shout. Take the higher road.
4 – Be diplomatic
Pretty much everyone has a strong feeling whichever side of the debate they are on. Nobody is saying you should implement Chatham House Rules around your holiday dinner table, but listening and learning to each other is surely the only way we can get through this, right?
5 – Take some deep breaths
This could work. Maybe. Just don’t think about Nigel Farage’s smug face.
OH CRAP
6 – Come out
Coming out could be a contender for the best distraction you might get from Brexit conversations. Chatting to your gran about whether you have a boyfriend/girlfriend/significant other or about your gender identity might be preferable to having to talk about Brexit again… Even if she asks if you ‘are the woman ore the man’ in a relationship.
BUT in all seriousness, only come out if you are ready and safe to do so. It can be big decision, and if you do choose to come out this Christmas, good luck!
7 – Stock up on delicious European foods
There is a strong possibility that many of your favourite Euro foods might get a whole lot more expensive once Article 50 is triggered, so enjoy them while you can.
Even if some items are temporarily unavailable or extortionately expensive after Article 50, you still might want to forego turkey and spuds for Nutella and Marmite. And Cornichons on the side for good measure.
NUTELLA ON EVERYTHING!
8Â – Do some yoga
Some strong Ashtanga postures or some relaxing Hatha ones might be just what you need. If it all gets too much, you might want to hide away upstairs or outside or anywhere away from your family or holiday guests.
9Â – Run away and hide
This could be the best option – just run away, stock up on tinned goods and catch up on Netflix in a camper van in the Outer Hebrides or a disused bunker somewhere until it’s all over. It might be for the best.
10 – Just don’t discuss Brexit
It’s probably just best to avoid it really.
You have it in you – when faced with someone with opposing views, smile politely, nod, offer an impassioned but reasoned argument and then move onto Christmas pudding.
*BONUS* 11 – but if all else fails, talk about Trump.
If Brexit does come up and you don’t want to talk about it – bring up Trump. People are always keen to talk about Trump. And how the US has done what it has done. WHAT HAVE THEY DONE?! (If you want to read our guide to surviving a Trump Christmas, click here.)