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Everything you’ve always wanted to ask a bisexual person but were always too scared

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Bisexual Visibility Day is this Saturday but, despite the concept of multiple-gender attraction having existed since pretty much the dawn of time, a huge amount of people still seem to not know much about it. So here it is, all the questions you’ve ever wanted to ask a bisexual person.

Wanna have a threesome?
This is almost always the first questions asked and, almost always, the answer is no thanks.

What is bisexuality?
Bisexuality is sexual and/or romantic attraction to both same and different genders.

Does bisexuality mean you’re not attracted to transgender people?
No! Because a lot of older definitions say bisexuality is ‘attraction to men and women,’ there is a common misconception that bisexuality excludes transgender people, whereas pansexuality includes them.

So what is the difference between bisexual and pansexual then?
Not that much really! A lot of it comes down to personal preference, and many people identify as both.

A lot of people see bisexuality as being attracted to multiple genders, but gender still matters to you. You may be attracted to different genders in different ways, or have a “type” of man you’re attracted to, for example.

But many people think of pansexuality as attraction regardless of gender.

Bisexuality is also more commonly heard of, and has a more clearly documented history and political movement, which some people like. Others may like the idea of defining their sexuality with a term that is fairly new, and doesn’t have so many attachments.

bisexual flag

What about queer, then?
Queer is an umbrella term, so it widely spans everybody who isn’t heterosexual and cisgender. However it has a history of being used as a slur, and still sometimes is, so not everyone is comfortable with it.

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As with any reclaimed slur, queer is also a politicised word – often people who define themselves as queer will be involved with the LGBT+ political movement.

Don’t define someone as queer unless they said it about themselves first!

Do bisexual people just find everyone attractive?
Are straight women attracted to every man they meet?

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