Elliot Page says he ‘couldn’t see a future’ before his transition
Elliot Page has said that he found it almost impossible to “see a future” for himself before his transition.
The actor, who came out as transgender in 2020, spoke to Jay Shetty’s On Purpose podcast this week about how much his mindset has eased since transitioning and living in his truth.
Elliot Page explained that, before he came out, he struggled to complete everyday tasks or enjoy living in the present moment, and would often cling to romantic interests for support.
The Umbrella Academy star told Shetty: “For significant periods of my life, I struggled to function on a pretty basic level, it was hard for me to literally sit down, it was hard for me to be productive, for me to be present at all.
“I couldn’t see the future because I didn’t know how much longer I would last feeling that way.”
Now that he has fully transitioned, Page says that one of his favourite things is being able to experience daily life with a clear head.
“People go, ‘What was your last experience of gender euphoria?’, I’m like, ‘This morning when I was drinking coffee in silence and just being able to sit and have my coffee.’
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“Doing things in the past that I did enjoy but a part of me wasn’t there. It could just be going to meet some friends in the park and I’m really able to just be in the park with them. I’m not thinking about… just kind of wanting to get out always. Like always wanting to flee.
“It’s not like I’m Johnny social all of a sudden, but going from having a very difficult time being social, now getting to feel immersed in life, versus struggling to know how to live it.”
Elsewhere in the podcast, Page described himself pre-transition as a “serial monogamist” who clung to romantic interests as a way to distract himself from what was going on in his head.
Now, though, Page, who confirmed he is single at the moment, feels “exhilarated by the fact that [he] can be alone.”
“I’m very much enjoying connecting with people, maybe having some fun, but sort of just being on my own right now. And that is very new for me.”
Page raved that he feels better in every aspect of his life now, from relationships to his acting career to his day-to-day life.
“Literally everything in my life is better now,” he said. “There’s this ability to just exist every day on set and just be on my body.”
However, Page made a point to acknowledge his privileged position who has access to resources that other trans people might not.
“You’re going through this transition in front of a lot of people and having people speculate or make assumptions about your life that can be incredibly hurtful or demeaning,” he said of being a trans celebrity.
“At the same time, everything is relative and my position obviously comes with such an enormous amount of privilege like my life does not reflect the lives of most trans people who deal with a disproportionate amount of unemployment, poverty, incarceration, violence, etc. – particularly black trans people.
“I’d be lying if I said there weren’t certain elements of this sort of unusual experience don’t have its challenges or difficult moments, and at the same time, what I always go back to is the degree in which my privilege and resources help and protect me.”
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